Zelda: A Modern Day Griselda

Zelda had once again turned down a night out with the girls in the office. She just knew that this latest book was the one that would answer all her questions about men. The book market had been recently overpopulated with books on why men and women acted like they did and how they could find love in spite of themselves. Zelda had quite a stack of these and each time she bought one she was sure it would be her last. She just knew one of these books would find her true love. Between these books and her Loveswept Romances, Zelda did nothing but work and read.

On her way home, Zelda stopped at the grocery store for a Le Menu frozen dinner and a half gallon of Rocky Road ice cream. She tried not to think about the calories but instead concentrated on the happiness her new book would bring her. "Why Men Are The Way They Are" was this one. She was so sure of it, this time.

Hours later when the broccoli had hardened on the plastic plate and the last remnants of the ice cream were completely liquid, Zelda sighed and quietly closed her book. She then flung it against the wall and began sobbing. She yelled, "It just isn’t fair. I could really be worthy of a man. I could really love one. I’d be so dutiful….none of that feminist crap for me!"

She cleaned up her mess and stood holding the book realizing it had said what all the others had said. She didn’t want to find "her true self" or gain self-confidence. She just wanted a husband. None of the books had actually told her how to get a husband. They told her how to get along until she found one. She didn’t want to work hard at this or have to change. She grabbed her jacket from the closet and went for a walk.

The night air had a slight, but magical briskness to it. Normally Zelda would be frightened to walk alone at night, but her depression was so great that she believed herself immune to all harm. She had strayed far from her block when she realized she was in Howard Moore Park. She considered going back home when she heard someone calling her name, or some resemblance of her name. She walked toward the direction of the caller and could make out an old man standing by a small hut. The man was yelling for Griselda, not Zelda.

Zelda turned around quickly because a spotlight was aimed at her. Two police officers asked her what she was doing out here alone. She said, "I’m just taking a walk" and turned back toward the old man and the hut. But there were only trees there now. She closed her eyes and re-opened them, but still only saw the trees.

One of the police officers was right beside her now. "Ma’am, let us take you home. We’d feel much better because you really shouldn’t be out alone." She consented to let them drive her home. Once there she could only think about the old man calling the name Griselda. She finally fell asleep and dreamed of loud speakers blaring out her name then the name Griselda.

When she woke the next morning, she thought that everything that happened after throwing the book must have been a dream. She didn’t go back to the park for nearly a month. But every night she dreamed of her name being called over and over.

Then out of the blue one day, a guy from Zelda’s office asked her out on a date. Zelda was on cloud nine and was already convinced that this was the man she had been waiting for. She envisioned her life really beginning. She could quit her horrible job and just take care of a beautiful house and raise darling children. Zelda had never been more happy as she was the few days preceding her date.

The date started out badly for Zelda. Roger was late and just honked the car horn once he got there. She reluctantly went to the car. Zelda thought his true gentlemanly ways would appear at any moment.

At the restaurant he didn’t open the door for her. He didn’t pull her chair out for her. When the check came he said that he was a woman’s "liber" and could she please pay for her part of the bill. After leaving the restaurant, Zelda was fuming because she had given in and paid for her part of the bill. She was so angry that she didn’t notice that Roger wasn’t taking her home. He was headed for Howard Moore Park.

She wasn’t aware at first of her surroundings. Then the car stopped. Before she could ask any questions, Roger was on top of her kissing and groping. Zelda gave him a slight kick in the groin and was thus able to scramble out of the car while Roger doubled over in pain. Once out of the car she hoped to be helped by a passerby. There weren’t any. As she was looking around for help, Roger came lunging out of the car after her. Zelda sprinted toward a group of trees. The last thing she remembered was tripping and hitting her head.

When Zelda regained consciousness, she was in a small room with an old man. The old man had her wrapped in blankets and kept putting wet cloths on her forehead. She tried to speak, but the old man said, "No, Griselda. Just rest. You must be better by the Prince’s arrival." All Zelda could force out was, "I’m not Griselda."

Zelda dozed for a couple of more days. She dreamed of hitting her head on a stone then being carried off by a man on a white horse.

When Zelda regained consciousness for good, she remembered the terrible date with Roger. Roger, the man who had just honked for her, made her pay for half of the date and then had the nerve to molest her. Zelda wondered if there was any hope of finding a true gentleman, a prince she could admire and respect.

Before her thoughts could go any further, an old man whom everyone called Giannucolo ran into the room breathless. He yelled at Zelda saying, "Griselda, please get up. Prince Gualtieri will be here within the hour. You must be prepared to receive your new husband. If you’ll only let the women dress you, I won’t punish you for running away."

Zelda tried to explain that she wasn’t Griselda and they obviously had her confused with someone else. They just ignored her and began bathing her and cleansing her. Zelda did not yet have the strength or the clearest mind to protest. She allowed herself to be bathed and dressed by the women. Upon completion, she felt very fresh and beautiful. Zelda decided she needed to have women servants to dress her everyday. It was less hectic and she felt so much better.

As soon as Zelda was completely dressed, Giannucolo entered with a dashing young man. Giannucolo said, "Griselda, this is Prince Gualtieri. He has asked for your hand in marriage." Gualtieri reached for Zelda’s hand and lightly kissed it. Zelda swooned. She had never had a man kiss her on the hand. She decided that this was true love whether she was Zelda or Griselda. As Giannucolo supported Zelda, Gualtieri asked her some questions. "Will you always try to please me and never become angry over anything I do or say?" Gualtieri continued, "and will you always be obedient to me?"

Zelda replied, "yes".

Gualtieri led her outside and had her stripped of her clothing. She was re-adorned with a very elegant gown and a crown of jewels was placed atop her head. Gualtieri then spoke to the crowd saying, "This is my chosen bride whom you have promised to honor." Zelda was carried to a palfrey and escorted to the castle.

They were married in one of the castle’s gardens. Once at the castle, there was a lavish feast and celebration underway. Zelda allowed herself to be pampered and doted upon. She was so fascinated by the splendor of everything that she momentarily forgot that people were still mistaking her for that Griselda character.

She turned to one of the women that had just called her Griselda. "I’m not Griselda, really!" The woman humbly apologized. "Of course you’re not. I’m sorry, Princess Griselda." The woman quickly left in her embarrassment.

Gualtieri came to Zelda, took her hand and led her out onto the dance floor. He was a magnificent dancer and one without roaming hands. Those kind were always hard to find, thought Zelda. Time passed away as Zelda delighted in the splendor, the suave Prince and the ale. As the guests began retiring for the night, Gualtieri took Zelda’s hand and led her upstairs. Her heart was so full of love that she would do anything for her Prince.

So the time passed with Zelda in loving bliss and Gualtieri happy as a lark. One would think that Zelda would still be puzzled by the loss of her earlier life. But she didn’t have much time for thinking. Whenever she was with Gualtieri, pleasing him was the only thing on her mind. When her and Gualtieri were apart, her time was very structured. Gualtieri saw to it that Zelda (or Griselda, as she answered to now) was never alone. She had harp lessons, language lessons, sewing group, poetry readings and concerts to attend. She was also expected to make an appearance once a week among the villagers. She occupied her time this way because she believed that this pleased Gualtieri. So Zelda rarely thought of her old life, which wasn’t one of happiness for her anyway. She was happy beyond words now because she had found someone to love and to please.

Not even a year had passed when Zelda realized that she must be pregnant. She was so happy. She couldn’t wait to tell Gualtieri. When he found out he was extremely pleased.

Several months later Zelda gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. There was much rejoicing and feasting in the castle. But a few months after the birth, Gualtieri began using harsh words against Zelda. Fearful of loosing him, Zelda said nothing.

One day Gualtieri’s personal servant came to Zelda. "I’ve been ordered by my lord to take your daughter away and…" Before he could finish, Zelda handed over the baby and said, "Do what our lord has ordered you to do."

The servant took the baby and reported back to Gualtieri. He was quite amazed at having found such a dutiful wife. One might think that this was enough of a test. But no, Gualtieri being a man, had to test the limits. Many of Gualtieri’s vassals were outraged, really believing he had had his daughter killed.

Zelda tried even harder to please Gualtieri in the coming years. Eventually she became pregnant again. This time she gave birth to a son which she just knew would delight Gualtieri. And it did for awhile. After a few months the harsh words from Gualtieri began again. Zelda tried to avert the inevitable by first making sure the son was around Gualtieri only when the son was happy and cute. Later after that didn’t seem to work, she just kept the son away form Gualtieri as much as possible.

The fateful day came when the servant came to Zelda’s quarters with the same look as years before when he took her daughter away. Zelda handed over her son to the servant without a word spoken between them.

The kingdom was really in an uproar now. Gualtieri wasn’t just being cruel to Griselda, but he was endangering the vassals’ future, killing their prospective leader.

Several years passed and Gualtieri seemed content with Griselda. To keep the status quo, Zelda visited a wise woman to get a potion against pregnancy believing that the pregnancies caused Gualtieri’s cruelty. But alas, the happiness did not remain. The harsh words came once again to Zelda’s ears, burning even worse than before. She knew that her life would alter drastically this time.

One morning Gualtieri sent for her and in front of the entire court he produced papers signed by the pope giving Gualtieri leave to return her to her father and to procure for himself a more suitable wife. Zelda’s heart was ripped to shreds at the biting words coming from the lips of the one she loved so dearly.

And so Zelda went back to Giannucclo’s house. She left the castle with only a plain shift on. As she walked through the castle grounds, people knelt on one knee in honor of her once-held position and because they sincerely grieved for her condition.

Back at Giannucolo’s house, Zelda grieved all day and slept fitfully at night. Giannucolo, at first tried to comfort her, but later resorted to the "I told you so" approach. Zelda heard neither. She was too lost in her own wallowing pool of misery.

Zelda began having dreams of a different time and place from her present one. There was no Giannucolo, no Gualtieri and no misery. There was only love…and a different kind of love than the kind with Gualtieri. A pleasant, enriching sort of love would come into focus right before she would awaken.

With that glimmer of hope from her dreams, she was able to come out of her misery little by little. She began helping Giannucolo with the chores.

One morning as she was returning from the creek with a pail of water, one of Gualtieri’s most esteemed subjects rode up on horseback. "My lord wishes your presence back at the castle immediately."

Like a foolish schoolgirl with foolish hopes, she got on the horse and rode away to the castle. Upon arriving on the castle grounds, most people were so busy preparing for a celebration that they didn’t notice their former princess. Zelda was led into Gualtieri’s quarters. He spoke to her like a servant. "Griselda, I want you to prepare my home and my chambers for my new bride. She will be here within a day and only you know how I like things." Zelda was left alone in Gualtieri’s chambers to deal with yet another, more horrifying painful blow from the man she still so desperately loved.

By the time the new bride arrived, everything was in order due to Zelda’s hard work and devotion. Zelda was attempting to slip out quietly when Gualtieri spotted her and ordered her to greet his new bride.

A very young and beautiful girl was seated next to Gualtieri. Zelda came over and on bended knee welcomed the young girl and gave her best wishes for the marriage. Everyone in the hall was very quiet so that when Gualtieri spoke his voice pierced the silence. "Well, Griselda, don’t you think my new bride is beautiful?"

"My lord," replied Zelda, "she is very beautiful and if she is as wise as she is beautiful, I believe you will live in happiness for many years. But I beg you not to inflict upon her the many wounds you inflicted upon another that loved you."

Gualtieri was grinning ear-to-ear and sweetly asked Zelda to sit beside him. "Griselda, it is time for you to know the truth and to be rewarded. You have passed my test. I expose my former actions that many of you saw as cruel to be in actuality a test to determine whether Griselda was a good wife or not. But as you all see, she is a good wife. She has constantly obeyed me thus bringing me much peace and tranquility."

There was much whispering among the people present. Gualtieri went on, "Griselda and everyone else in attendance…I present to you the children of myself and Griselda. I only pretended to have them murdered. They were really sent away to my family in Bologna. They have been raised as royalty should and they have been returned to their parents now."

There was much rejoicing that lingered on into the night. Zelda played out her role as dutiful wife and gracious hostess until all the guests were gone to bed. She was able to convince Gualtieri that she was so physically and emotionally drained that she wanted to sleep alone if it was okay with him. He granted her that one request.

She fell asleep quickly, but did not sleep well due to her dreams. She awoke suddenly after only an hour of sleep. She put on her robe and quietly walked to Gualtieri’s chambers. She was soon standing beside his bed with a knife in hand. Not knowing how she got to this point physically or mentally, she just felt the incredible desire to raise the knife over his sleeping form.

As she brought the knife down toward Gualtieri, there was a rushing of wind all around her. She lost her footing and lost hold of the knife. She was twirling through a tunnel of fog. There were voices calling to her and thanking her.

She found herself lying in a bed of dead leaves. There were women standing all around her. They were dressed in different clothes depicting different time periods. Broken chains lay around all of them. One dressed in just fig leaves stepped up to Zelda and helped her to sit up. She then softly spoke to Zelda, "We welcome you sister, for you have done well on your journey. For ages that myth has been chaining and suffocating women to an ideal created by men. Many have tried to break through, but the promise of love often keeps women from seeing through the distortion. That’s where we get the phrase ‘blinded by love’. We thank you, Zelda. You have seen reality for what it is and thus saved the future for women. Go in peace, live your life to your fullest possible potential and happiness. Remember what you have learned and what you have attained for yourself and for your sisters."

The women then slowly faded from view. Zelda realized she was in Howard Moore Park close to her home. Strange how she could so clearly see herself as Zelda and Griselda…almost like two different sides of the same coin. Zelda slowly walked home.

What more can be said here, won’t. Your imagination will decide how Zelda lived out the rest of her life.

©Rhonda Kelley 1988